Roasting someone is an art. A good roast makes people laugh while leaving a lasting impression. It is clever, quick, and sometimes a little brutal. Whether you are joking with friends or just sharpening your wit, having a list of Best Roasts and comebacks is essential. Below, you will find 80 roasts and comebacks that are clever, funny, and perfectly timed to make everyone laugh.

1-20: Classic and Clever Roasts

You bring everyone so much joy… when you leave the room.
A twist on a compliment that turns it into a savage burn.

I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
Perfect for someone who never admits they are mistaken.

Your secrets are safe with me. I never even listen when you tell me them.
A subtle burn that targets talkative friends.

You’re like a cloud. When you disappear, it’s a beautiful day.
Simple and visual, but painfully effective.

You have something on your face… oh wait, that’s just your face.
Classic insult with a punchy delivery.

I’d explain it to you, but I left my crayons at home.
Ideal for someone struggling to understand simple things.

You bring everyone together… by being the topic of gossip.
Funny and socially cutting.

You have something in common with my wifi… weak signal.
Modern and relatable, with a clever twist.

You are proof that even evolution takes a break sometimes.
A smart science-inspired burn.

You bring happiness… when you’re not around.
Short, effective, and memorable.

Your face makes onions cry.
Simple, visual, and brutally funny.

You’re as useless as the ‘g’ in lasagna.
Wordplay meets insult for maximum effect.

You have an entire life to be anyone, but you chose… that.
Cleverly highlights bad decisions.

You’re proof that even bad decisions deserve a face.
A witty insult that turns reality into humor.

You bring drama… like a soap opera with commercials.
Funny, relatable, and slightly over the top.

I’d call you a tool… but even tools serve a purpose.
Classic one-liner that lands perfectly.

You have a face for radio.
Short and culturally understood.

You’re the human version of a typo.
Clever wordplay that stings.

Your talent is hiding… really well.
Underhanded, sarcastic, and perfectly cutting.

You bring excitement… like watching paint dry.
A gentle but firm roast for boring people.

21-40: Wordplay and Pun Roasts

You’re like a software update… nobody asked for you.
Modern humor meets social burn.

You’re like a cloud… mostly useless and full of hot air.
Double-layered visual insult.

Your personality is like a dial-up connection… painfully slow.
Perfect for anyone who takes too long to understand things.

You’re as sharp as a marble.
Short, funny, and ridiculous.

You bring the same joy as a Monday morning alarm.
Relatable and humorous.

You have the charisma of a soggy sock.
Odd but memorable comparison.

You’re like a software bug… annoying and unavoidable.
Modern, clever, and hits perfectly.

You bring light… only in your own imagination.
Poetic yet cutting.

You’re the human version of a participation trophy.
Funny and slightly cruel.

You have something in common with the ocean… mostly empty.
Visual and insulting at the same time.

You’re the reason we can’t have nice things.
Short, effective, and universally understood.

Your ego is so big, it needs its own zip code.
Exaggeration makes this roast memorable.

You’re like a puzzle with missing pieces… impossible to complete.
Clever, wordplay-based burn.

You bring confusion… like a badly translated sign.
Relatable and funny.

Your voice could be used as a warning signal.
Humorous jab without being overcomplicated.

You’re like decaf coffee… disappointing.
Simple, clever, and modern.

You have the charm of a wet sponge.
Odd but effective insult.

You’re a cloud with no silver lining.
Short, poetic, and perfectly roasting.

You have the intelligence of a dial tone.
Modern, simple, and stings.

You’re a human participation ribbon.
Mixing humor and insult efficiently.

41-60: Sarcastic and Savage Roasts

You’re like a cloud… annoying and blocking the sun.
Simple, clever, and slightly poetic.

Your face could scare mirrors.
Short, visual, and impactful.

You bring joy… to comedians who roast people.
Funny and clever.

You have the warmth of a refrigerator.
Simple metaphor, brutally effective.

You’re like a broken pencil… pointless.
Classic, short, and funny.

Your personality is like expired milk… sour and unwanted.
Food metaphor that stings.

You bring excitement… only to disaster movies.
Clever and memorable.

You’re like WiFi in the woods… unreliable and frustrating.
Modern, funny, and relatable.

You have the grace of a falling brick.
Short, visual, and highly effective.

Your voice should come with subtitles.
Funny, sarcastic, and clever.

You’re a human software glitch.
Modern and simple, yet effective.

You bring happiness… only if it’s sarcasm.
Subtle twist that lands.

You’re like a spoiler… nobody asked for it.
Clever, modern, and punchy.

You have the impact of a damp feather.
Funny and insulting.

You’re the reason some instructions have pictures.
Visual, relatable, and effective.

You bring the charm… only to horror movies.
Short, sarcastic, and perfect.

You’re like an expired coupon… useless and forgotten.
Humorous and relatable.

Your sense of humor is like a broken clock… right only twice a day.
Clever, visual, and funny.

You bring attention… only in the wrong ways.
Simple, short, and humorous.

You’re like decaf tea… disappointing every time.
Subtle, yet painful.

61-80: Modern and Memorable Roasts

You have the taste of stale bread.
Visual and funny.

You’re like a flat tire… annoying and slowing everyone down.
Simple metaphor that stings.

Your brain is like a sponge… but it never absorbed anything.
Clever and biting.

You bring inspiration… only to horror writers.
Funny, sarcastic, and effective.

You’re like an old meme… outdated and ignored.
Modern, relatable, and humorous.

You’re like a phone with no signal… useless when we need you most.
A modern, visual roast that hits perfectly.

Your ideas are like expired milk… sour and rejected.
Short, relatable, and painful.

You bring style… only if mismatched socks are a trend.
Funny, sarcastic, and memorable.

You’re the human equivalent of a participation ribbon.
Reinforces humor while highlighting mediocrity.

Your personality is like elevator music… bland and unavoidable.
Simple, clever, and painfully accurate.

You’re like a broken GPS… always leading people the wrong way.
Modern metaphor for constant mistakes.

You bring joy… only in horror stories about friends.
Short, sarcastic, and funny.

You have the charm of a traffic jam.
Relatable and instantly understood.

You’re like a cloudy day… depressing and unnecessary.
Visual and poetic, yet stings.

Your sense of style is like expired milk… smells bad and makes people uncomfortable.
A playful twist with visual impact.

You bring excitement… only like a pop quiz nobody studied for.
Clever, sarcastic, and painfully accurate.

You’re like a forgotten password… frustrating and annoying.
Modern, relatable, and funny.

Your brain is like a web browser with too many tabs… slow and about to crash.
Clever tech-inspired burn.

You have the warmth of a freezer.
Short, simple, and insulting.

You bring excitement… like a Monday morning alarm clock.
A classic, relatable, and perfect finishing burn.

These 80 roasts are a perfect mix of clever, sarcastic, and funny lines. Each one is a Best Roast designed to make everyone laugh while showing off your wit. They work in conversation, texts, or even social media.