80 Animal Jokes That Are the Wildest

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Get ready to roar with laughter. Whether you are a fan of fluffy pets or fierce jungle beasts, these Animal Jokes​ will tickle your funny bone. From farm animals to ocean creatures, these wild punchlines are perfect for kids and adults. Simple, silly, and always surprising, these jokes bring the zoo to you.

Wild and Hilarious: The Animal Jokes Start Here

1. Why did the cow win an award?
Because it was outstanding in its field.

2. What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?
Sofishticated.

3. Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks.

4. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator.

5. Why are elephants so wrinkled?
Because they take too long to iron.

6. What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.

7. Why don’t oysters donate to charity?
Because they are shellfish.

8. What do you get when you cross a parrot and a shark?
A bird that talks your ear off before eating you.

9. Why did the duck go to therapy?
It had too many quacks in its life.

10. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.

From the Farm to the Jungle: Keep Laughing

11. Why did the horse go behind the tree?
To change his jockeys.

12. What’s a cat’s favorite color?
Purr-ple.

13. Why was the crab so bad at sharing?
Because he was a little shellfish.

14. What’s a snake’s favorite subject?
Hiss-tory.

15. How do cows do math?
With a cow-culator.

16. What did one flea say to the other flea?
Shall we walk or take the dog?

17. Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baaa-rber shop.

18. What do you call a pig that knows karate?
A pork chop.

19. Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.

20. What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk.

These Animal Jokes Are No Tall Tail

21. What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.

22. Why did the bee get married?
Because he found his honey.

23. What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?
A python a la mode.

24. What do cats like to eat for breakfast?
Mice Krispies.

25. What’s a cow’s favorite holiday?
Moo Year’s Day.

26. What animal can you always find at a baseball game?
A bat.

27. Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the shell station.

28. What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangaroo?
A woolly jumper.

29. What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer.

30. Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.

Zoo-m Into the Laughs

31. How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.

32. What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A bloodhound.

33. Why are frogs so happy?
Because they eat whatever bugs them.

34. What do you call a rabbit with fleas?
Bugs Bunny.

35. Why did the lion eat the comedian?
He wanted a taste of funny bone.

36. What is a crocodile’s favorite game?
Snap.

37. What is a cheetah’s favorite game?
Tag. Because it is always it.

38. What do cows read?
The moos-paper.

39. What did the buffalo say to his son?
Bison.

40. What do penguins wear to the beach?
Flipper flops.

More Animal Jokes to Make You Howl

41. Why don’t pandas like fast food?
Because they cannot catch it.

42. What do you call a horse that lives next door?
Your neigh-bor.

43. How do cats end a fight?
They hiss and make up.

44. Why did the goat run for office?
He was tired of the nanny state.

45. Why do flamingos lift one leg?
Because if they lifted both, they would fall.

46. Why was the owl good at math?
Because it gives a hoot.

47. What do you call a moody horse?
A nightmare.

48. Why don’t koalas count as bears?
They do not have the koalafications.

49. What do you get when you cross a dog and a calculator?
A friend you can count on.

50. Why did the cow go to space?
To visit the Milky Way.

Under the Sea and Over the Moon

51. What do you call a group of musical whales?
An orca-stra.

52. What kind of fish loves going to war?
A swordfish.

53. What did the dolphin say when it broke up with its girlfriend?
I am done porpoise-fully.

54. Why do fish never do well in school?
Because they are always swimming below sea level.

55. What do you get if you cross a jellyfish and a porcupine?
A creature that is painful to hug.

56. What’s a shark’s favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish.

57. Why do octopuses never fight each other?
Because they are too well-armed.

58. What do you call a crab who throws things?
A lob-star.

59. Why did the shrimp refuse to share?
Because he was a little shellfish.

60. What do sea horses do on dates?
They ride the tide together.

Flying High With More Animal Jokes

61. Why do hummingbirds hum?
Because they forgot the words.

62. What do you get when you cross an eagle with a skunk?
A bird that really stinks at soaring.

63. What do owls say when they go trick or treating?
Happy Owl-o-ween.

64. Why did the duck sit on the eggs?
Because it wanted to lay low.

65. Why did the parrot get a timeout?
It was talking back.

66. What is a pigeon’s favorite kind of music?
Coo-ntry.

67. What do you get when you cross a turkey and a ghost?
A poultry-geist.

68. Why did the peacock fail the talent show?
Too proud to practice.

69. What’s a bat’s favorite fruit?
Blood orange.

70. What do you call a sneaky chicken?
A poultry-geist.

The Last Laughs in the Animal Kingdom

71. Why did the lizard break up with the snake?
Because it felt constricted.

72. What is a zebra’s favorite pattern?
Stripe.

73. What do hedgehogs say when they kiss?
Ouch.

74. What do you call a mouse that can sing?
A Minnie singer.

75. What did the raccoon say when it got caught?
You got me red-pawed.

76. Why did the ant sit on a phone?
To be on speaker.

77. What do you call an angry monkey?
Furious George.

78. Why did the fox stay out of the henhouse?
He was trying to turn over a new leaf.

79. What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No-eye-deer.

80. Why did the skunk start a perfume company?
It believed in its scent-sational talent.

Final Thoughts on Animal Jokes

There you have it. Eighty Animal Jokes that bring the funny straight from the farm, the zoo, the sea, and the sky. These clever jokes are perfect for a classroom, a family game night, or a moment when you just need a little laugh.

Animals may not talk in real life, but in the world of humor, they have plenty to say. From punny punchlines to laugh-out-loud surprises, these jokes show how wild and witty the animal kingdom can be. Remember them, share them, and let the laughter stampede on.

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